Dealing With Infidelity Spouse
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What do you do if your spouse can’t forgive you?
My husband and I have been married almost 10 years. We separated a year ago and during that time I was in a relationship with another man. I broke off the relationship and my husband and I have been going to a marriage counselor. We are back together now, but he holds the “affair” over my head and uses it to get his way in arguments and to justify any bad behavior he does. He says he can’t live without me and loves me more than anything, but he can’t (won’t) forgive me. I understand that infidelity takes a long time to get over. (I have dealt with the same from him) I just don’t see much of a future if he can’t forgive me. Should I seek divorce? He is using the past as an excuse to look at internet porn and join in cyber sex groups. I fear that this will eventually lead to him having an affair. He is destroying what little we have left and I don’t know what to do.
It sounds to me like he wants to cheat and found a convenient excuse for doing it….your affair. I hate to tell u this but it doesn’t look like u two have much of a future together because it sounds as though u can’t trust each other.
Donna Fortney, LPC and Imago Relationship Therapist, Dealing with Infidelity!
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May 10th, 2010 at 12:39 am
Sorry to say this but it sounds like he may be cheating but just don’t jump to conclusions without really finding out for sure. If coming home late and never acted like he is towards you now is out of character for him you probably have reason to be suspicious. Sit down and talk to him and find out why he is not being loving to you anymore and why he is always late anymore. You could probably even go by the deli when he is supposed to get off work and tell him that you thought that you would surprise him by meeting him to go out to dinner and see how he acts about that. Suppose you could even just be near the deli where he works when he is due to get off and see where he goes from there and if he leaves with her. But I would only do that as a last resort after talking to him and if not satisfied with his answers.
May 10th, 2010 at 11:29 pm
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June 5th, 2010 at 2:11 am
Probably not. I know I would never forget it.
November 29th, 2010 at 8:22 am
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December 15th, 2010 at 5:14 am
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