Infidelity Tracking
Wednesday, March 2nd, 2011
Please help…I’m really confused…?
I started dating this guy about 6 mnths ago and i have major trust issues. I try to trust him seeing as how he hasn’t given me a reason not too but I’m really afraid Of Infidelity. My stepmom (who raised me) always thinks my dad is cheating even though he isnt and my sister is with a guy who cheated on her. They’re always telling me that men will cheat given the right opportunity. I never used to think that but they keep telling me not to be so naive.
I now find myself being suspicous of everything. I’ve even gone as far as to count/keep track of the number of condoms me and my bf have. It’s immature/insecure i know, but a couple have gone missing. he said it’s possible that his best friend could have taken them but his friend doesnt even live with him. Why would his friend take his condoms, why wouldnt he just buy his own?
I really don’t want to turn out like my stepmom/sister. What should I do?
(My bf has been cheated on in the past by more than one gf)
Sit down with your guy and explain all of the above to him. Talk to him about it as an abstract, not as an accusation. Let him know that those things are worrying you and that you don’t want to worry about them but can’t help it.
Then look back at who you are getting advice from. Are they in happy loving relationships or not. The worst thing in the world to do is to take advice on relationships from someone that can’t handle their own. All they can do is give you bad advice. I understand the issue. If I constantly had someone pouring ‘she’ll cheat on you’ into my head, I’d worry also.
The best thing you can do is to take a step back and look at what you are enjoying about your relationship, and realize that all your paranoia and panic is doing is sucking all the fun right out of it. If your boyfriend DOES cheat on you (and yes, it happens) then deal with it at that time. But until that time, you should enjoy your relationship with him to the fullest.
A word of warning. If I found out that you were so distrusting of me that you actually counted the number of condoms that we used. I’d leave you without a second look. Btw, condoms do pop when you put them on sometimes, likely one or two simply busted and he didn’t mention it at the time.
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